As conversations go, even by Bangkok’s eclectic standards, that
evening’s was certainly a strange one. Without invitation, Jim had introduced
himself as a former police officer from New York, three years retired and now
living in the Missouri Ozarks: “What
about Trump?”
I’d arranged to meet
friend and fellow motorcycle traveller Greg Frazier for our annual evening of
drinking and bullshit on Sukhumvit Road, but due to the unpredictability of
Bangkok’s transportation network, I’d arrived almost an hour earlier than
planned. Intent on conversation, Jim had
found me on a random barstool killing time with an over-priced beer and
desperately trying to avoid all forms of human contact. It’s not that I don’t
like people, or that I don’t appreciate the opportunity to speak unbroken English
once in a while, it’s just that I don’t particularly enjoy interacting with the
kind of people who tend to frequent the bars on Lower Sukhumvit Road, the
sin-centre of Bangkok.
Feigning deafness, I’d successfully dodged his political
opening question, which experience tells me is a reasonable tactic to employ
anywhere in the world, but avoidance of his follow-up would’ve appeared a
little too rude, even for somewhere like Sukhumvit Road: “So, what brings you here?” When I’d replied “I actually live here”, I’m sure he’d almost winked at me. But,
before I’d had time to qualify what ‘here’
had actually meant, he’d placed my second beer on his account and in doing so,
had successfully hijacked the next thirty minutes of my life.
The following morning, as the alcoholic haze had finally begun
to disperse, my mind had wandered back to that conversation with Jim. During
recent summers in California, I’d encountered several people with a similar
outlook on life to his; genuinely successful, sane and intelligent people who for
often undeclared reasons, believe that the total breakdown of civil society is
an imminent danger, and whilst leading seemingly normal lives, are discreetly preparing
themselves for any eventuality. I’d always referred to these people as ‘survivalists’,
but Jim had preferred the term ‘prepper’, describing himself as a person
prepared, both mentally and physically, for whatever event might lead to
geographical and social catastrophe on a global scale. In fact, Jim’s 10-day
vacation in Bangkok had, according to him, been part of his private
preparations, a final chance to flex certain muscles before, well, whatever lay
ahead for the world. As for the causation ‘event’ that Jim considered most
likely, it wasn’t the socio-economic meltdown and subsequent violent revolution
that I’d suggested, but a catastrophe caused by forces originating from far beyond
our own solar system…… “Oh, you mean aliens?” I’d asked.
Had Jim responded positively to my admittedly slightly
sarcastic question, I could’ve easily walked away without ever casting my mind
back to our conversation, but sadly, he hadn’t. Instead, he’d encouraged me to
do my own research, to investigate certain natural phenomena using scientific
data from such institutions as European Space Agency, United States Geographical
Survey and NASA. The fact that Jim hadn’t quoted extracts from Revelations had certainly increased his
credibility, but that, unfortunately, had made his departing advice slightly
more chilling than it ought to have been.
Apparently, from December 24th
to 27th 2016, I need to be well away from Bangkok, or any other
place in the world that isn’t located at least 1,000 feet above sea level and
ideally, as far away from tectonic fault lines as possible. In this part of
Asia finding such a location would be difficult, but a little research tells me
that a home in somewhere like the Missouri Ozarks, would be almost perfect.
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